Thursday, July 24, 2008

Everything is coming together

Finally,

I am happy to report that I think things are starting to come together more. I took a lot of time to think, ponder, change my mind a million and a half times, and I've made some important decisions in the past week.

I was about to sign a lease in LA for the next nine months. And I just couldn't do it. I had people around me questioning why I was committing to LA another 9 months and what I had here, and the answer was, I don't know, and I don't feel like I have much if anything at all.

I gave LA my best shot for now. I became disillusioned with the dream of being a comic and what it really takes in a city like this. I also started transitioning and I think ultimately I had to choose one journey over the other. The transition came first, and I'm happy about it. Nonetheless, I'm done with LA as a result.

I need to be near my major support systems and right now, they are in Chicago. So, I have a year to kill while I prepare to take the LSAT in December and then apply to law school. I decided I want to spend that time with my family, close friends, and girlfriend. It's important, ESPECIALLY at this time.

So, I've made my decision. I'm leaving LA next week and I couldn't be more excited.
I'll be driving home this time and I'm kind of looking forward to the road trip. I've never been to some of the states I'll be driving through.

I'm also happy to report that I will be applying for a new driver's license that says I'm a male!!! California is apparently one of the only states that lets you change your sex on your license before you have surgery. I just had to have my doctor here fill out a form. I'm going to apply for my new license tomorrow!!!

I know I'll be driving on a California license in Illinois, but that's ok with me. It's safer for me to have that license saying I'm male now that I fully present as one, then me getting pulled over in the suburbs of Chicago and having a license that says female while I have a 5 o'clock shadow.

Also, I've been asked to write another article for IN LA magazine!!! The first one got a lot of feedback, great reviews, and they like my story. So, I'll be sure to keep you posted on when the next one is published!

It is a little overwhelming to be working 40 hours a week and packing up all my stuff, but it has also been therapeutic. I feel a lot more at peace this week than I have in a long time, and I'm very very grateful.

In terms of physical changes this week, there are a few. Those of you who know me and my singing voice know that one of my favorite tunes to sing at karaoke was Bonnie Rait, Let's Give Em Something to talk about. I'm sad and proud to report that I can no longer hit the high notes in that song!!!! It's crazy!! In one week, I feel like my voice dropped so much!!!

I've also been getting a lot hairier on my legs and my facial hair is coming in thicker. The hair on my head also feels like the texture is changing and like I'm losing some of it....I swear if I get male pattern baldness as a result of this....I'm definitely going to the Hair Club for Men.

The transition of my entire life continues. Stay tuned!!





2 comments:

The Professor said...

Wow - well I'm bummed that you're leaving but I'm SOOO happy for you to see you thriving. I hope you'll keep us updated! I can definitely tell that your voice is lower. The shape of your face, the facial hair... I haven't even seen you in person but the videos definitely show a lot of change. I'm really proud of all the steps you've taken to live the life you're meant to live. You're an inspiration. And quite handsome, I might add! Way to go, Jamie.

Barbara said...

Good luck with all your changes. You have a lot on your plate, but I'm glad your path is revealing itself. I wish the the best with everything! But I don't think you're going to need it!