I'm finally home

Sorry it has taken me so long to blog. I drove cross country from LA to Chicago, and what an interesting journey that was.

I changed the sex on my California driver's license to say Male instead of Female, and until it arrives, I am driving on a temporary, paper license. And that made the road trip to Chicago more interesting when I got pulled over in UTAH for speeding.

The officer was actually really nice. He took the paper license, gave me a ticket, and mostly sent us on our way. It was a little confusing though because on his copy of my ticket, my information printed out with "FEMALE" on it, but then he crossed it out and wrote male when he saw my paper license. But then when he was headed back to his car, he said something to my girlfriend about making sure she "slows HER down" (referring to me). So truthfully, I have no idea what gender he thought I was. And it could have been really bad, but it actually went really well, except for the part where I got the ticket.

Overall though, the road trip was smoothly. No other tickets, mishaps, or car trouble, so I'm thankful for that. I think I'm not the road tripping kind of guy. I like to just get where I am going.

A day or two after I arrived in Chicago, I went traveling again. This time, I went to Canada. It was my first time and I had a blast. I went to Niagara Falls.

I was nervous crossing the border because my passport says female still, but they really didn't question it at all. I was with a few other people which I think made it easier as well.

My passport wasn't required to get into Canada, but I'm still using a paper driver's license so I needed a photo ID of some sort.

Now I'm back from Canada, and trying to get back into the swing of things here at home.

I'm happy to report that my mother has been unusually cooperative in the last two visits I've had with her this week. She met my new girlfriend, and has been attempting to say "HE" and call me her son. THIS IS HUGE. I know she is struggling, but the fact that she is making the effort at all means a lot. I hope she continues to.

My sister has also been great. She's been reinforcing that I am a boy to my niece and nephew, and also trying hard to switch pronouns.

So, my homecoming so far has been totally unexpected and very much appreciated.

I'm also currently on the hunt for a new doctor and therapist. I have a few recommendations that I am going to follow up on in the next couple of days.

And other than that, it's time to bury myself in the house and study for my LSAT exam.

In terms of my actual transition and physical changes, my voice continues to play tricks on me. Some days I feel it going deeper and coming in stronger, other days I feel raspy and have a sore throat. I still struggle most days with my singing voice. Randomly, I crack and have breaks in my voice where I didn't used to. I'm also trying to teach myself to breathe in different ways to hit the lower notes. Sometimes it is really frustrating, but I know in the end, it will all be fine. It's just that literally, I'm like a 12 year old boy, and that's ok, as long as it isn't permanent.

My body continues to have tightness and cramping, especially in my legs. Still feel like I'm having growing pains. I'm sure I need to be taking more vitamins to help with that though.

The hair on my face, arms, armpits, and legs is starting to come in more and thicker. Looks like I'm going to be the typical hairy jewish guy :)

My appetite is also weird. I wake up very early in the morning from hunger pains sometimes and now I enjoy eating a large breakfast usually consisting of some type of omelette. I didn't used to be a real breakfast person.

My moods continue to be up and down. I feel strong surges of emotion at random times of day and sometimes when I should feel a strong surge of emotion, I don't. That continues to be frustrating and not easy to deal with, but I'm just trying to ride the wave and deal. I think the more I am aware of it, the easier it becomes to deal with until it passes.

I think that about sums up everything going on with me for now. :)